I’m Not Buying

For Ss and Gs, I opened a few accounts. Find me on The Facebook at Cara Thereon. I’m on Twitter @thereon_cara. Lets call this a social media experiment, so indulge me by popping by and giving me a follow.

Writing test from Andy for the week. It’s a twofer! I’m giving you a poem and attempting to master the all dialogue challenge. Neither was easy to write.

Prompt: black magic

The essence of her magic
Is a voodoo long thought dead

Ancient script from her fingertips
Seducing with things she’s said

Chanting words to bind them close
Sewing love with slender thighs

Her practice passed from her mother’s lips
On how to snare a man with only her eyes



“Hi, I —”

“My insurance is good, I don’t need any pizzas, and my lawn don’t need mowed.”

“That’s fine, but I’m —”

“And I don’t need any new vacuum cleaners; the last one I got was a piece of junk.”

“Um… Okay, but I’m not —”

“No, Girl Scout cookies either. Little girl worked some kind of black magic and robbed me blind. Had to dip into my pension to pay her.”

“I’m not selling cookies, ma’am —”

“None of whatever the Boy Scouts sells. What is that? Popcorn? None of that.”

“Not a Boy Scout. I’m actually here to talk to you about —”

“I already believe in Jesus, too. Been attending Grace Chapel since I was knee-high. The last preacher was my second husband’s cousin, twice removed. May he rest in peace.”

“I’m… Glad. Yes, well I —”

“I don’t want whatever you’re selling so you might as well not even bother.”

“Oh! I… I… Thank you for your time, ma’am. Have a nice evening.”

“Wait! Where are you going?”

“You just told me you weren’t interested…”

“You didn’t even try! Don’t they teach you kids anything in school? You gotta woo your customer and make them believe that what you’re selling is important. You gotta make me fall in love, young man. You can’t take no for an answer. Now, let’s try this again. Whatdoyawant?”

“Er… I’m actually going door to door selling funeral plots. It’s a two for one deal; get your second grave site free. They’re dirt cheap, and —”

“Is this some kind of sick joke? Did Joan put you up to this?”

“No, ma’am. It’s —”

“Get off my front porch! How could you come here and frighten me like this? You oughta be ashamed of yourself.”

“Ouch! I’m sorry! I’m going! Ow!”

“Believing I’d buy anything, any old body would sell. Shame on you.”

“Shame on me is right!”


  1. ahblack57

    Loved both. The poem was sparse and haunting and very effective. The dialogue piece was fabulous. I could picture both the crotchety old woman and the nervous young salesman. Everything was spot on, natural and believable and entertaining. Outstanding job on both counts and if you found it difficult it didn’t show. Loved it!

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  2. TemptingSweets99

    Question: I looked at Andy’s site. Part of title reads April 9-15 or something like that. Does that mean you have until the 15th to write something?

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