Having read this and recently watched Fury, this has been on my mind.
I have no experience with war so I know my writing is lacking, but this demanded a voice so take it at face value. Special thank you to an amazing proofreader who kept me on track with my war history.
Thank you to those who have and do serve. You have immeasurable value.
“Ideals are peaceful, history is violent” – Fury
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He tried blinking the sweat from his eyes, but his vision refused to clear. Between the heat and the fear it was a useless task.
The sound of shrapnel whistling through the air and screams of pain set him trembling again. He blinked, refusing to take his eyes off the field of fire to his front or his finger off the trigger.
A man rushed into the field in front of him and he fired. He didn’t know him. Just a face that would gun him down if he didn’t take the shot.
There was so much damn smoke around them it was any wonder he didn’t choke on it.
He glanced at his periphery at the body of his squad mate, a grass-fed farm boy from Pennsylvania. The redhead stayed focused even as the man on the other side of him screamed in agony, a gaping wound in his shoulder.
He thought of his wife at home with his new son and a spasm of pain gripped his chest so hard that for a moment he wondered if he’d been shot. What the hell was he doing here in this godforsaken field instead of at home with them? For God and country mattered little when they’d send you home in a body bag or back with no limbs. He shuddered at the thought.
“Remember, you kill them bastards before they kill you.”
The sergeant’s directive echoed in his ears as the call to charge went out. He stared ahead into the smoke-filled meadow and summoned courage from within.
“Fuck,” he whispered to himself.
Death was looking him straight in the face, but as he rose to his feet he comforted himself with the knowledge that he’d take a few sons of a bitch with him.
Comments
Excellent sense of what’s going on and the emotion that are felt.
Oh…I forgot to thank you for referencing my deployment story. A good memory in the midst of a difficult and trying time.
Author
You’re very welcome. It was touching in a lot of ways, poignant.
I thought long and hard about that event before I wrote the post. When my wife and I read the old letter that I wrote (where I told her about that night), we were both in tears. It hurt to tell the story, but it was a good hurt – a melancholy moment during a terrible time in my life.
wow – excellent approach!
Author
Thanks.
*Maybe* it’s lacking something, *maybe* but I don’t see what. Emotions are emotions and horror is horror. While we can never know what it’s like to be there without actually being there, I’d say you did a damn good job of capturing what some (maybe most?) people feel in a situation like that.
Author
Lacking may not be the right word. I just have no true experience to draw from. All I have is emotion and speculation.
You’re a writer. You don’t have to have actual experience to draw from in order to paint a picture, you simply have to understand the human condition, empathize with other people, and be able to bring words to life. And yeah, you’ve done that.
Think about it – do you think all those paranormal erotica authors are out fucking vampires, werewolves, and shifters? Nope, but they still manage to make it “believable” for readers. 🙂
Author
Hahaha. Sex with a shifter does sound fun. I should try writing about that!
Cara,
I have been there. I have similar experiences (as you covered in this post) to draw on and I have to tell you that I think you did a fantastic job expressing what many of us deal with out there.
Thank you.
The Res Badge of Courage comes to mind here 🙂
Author
The things military in active duty had to endure. Just mind blowing
Even the most screwed up of us veterans would do it all over again if given the choice. I miss my buddies and being in the suck with them (which sounds odd saying on a sex blogger’s blog).
*Red!
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