I Challenge You

So the 4th round of Smut Marathon is done and we’ve slid into round 5 for those who remain. A lot of feelings surfaced at the close of voting and I’ve debated a lot about my response to it. Here’s my entry:

“So fucking sexy.”

The words carry her to the bed, caressing her body as she slips between the sheets. Their scents linger on the pillows, his cedar cologne and her mango perfume. She breathes them in and lets the smells stir her.

“Spread your legs, let me see your cunt.”

The words lead her to obey. She spreads her legs, parting her labia and circling her clit.

“You’re wet, aren’t you? Show me.”

She plunges two fingers in, coating both digits. Lifting them, the air cools them as she displays her juices. She sucks them into her mouth, licking them clean.

“Fuck yourself.”

Rolling over, she opens the drawer and pulls out the fat dildo under the tissues and notecards. She brings it to her nose and inhales, moaning at the hint of cunt.

She glides it between her labia, wetting it and teasing her clit. The dildo sinks inside, the glass warming as she holds it in her body. Pulling it out, she digs her heels in and lifts her hips as she thrusts it back in. Each thrust is rougher, perfect to make her soar.

“God, that cunt. I bet it feels good, I bet it would grip my cock hard.”

Her body flutters around the dildo, gripping it like she longs to grip him. She pinches her nipple and rockets over the edge with a jagged cry. As she spasms, her come pools under her ass, soaking their sheets.

“Good girl.”

She lay for a moment, thinking of them. When her heart slows, she returns Sara’s dildo to the drawer and rises from the bed. Silence descends as she turns off the recording of Dave’s voice.

They’ll be back from vacation tomorrow, leaving time for her come to dry. Her scent should mingle perfectly with theirs.

This is a dark story and that was on purpose. I left it up to the reader to determine her intentions. They aren’t good, if you’re wondering. There’s a deeper story here, but I wanted to communicate as much as I could in this snippet. It appealed to people, but I know it wasn’t a story for everyone. That’s okay. My writing isn’t everyone’s cuppa.

I had thoughts concerning how people felt about the competition, but have kept them to myself. I said some/things on Twitter that may be worth reading, but I’m not going to make this post about anything other than keeping myself on task. I wanted to say a few things so here’s my thoughts.

I’ve struggled through this competition. Anxiety and uncertainty about my writing has reigned supreme. It’s been a battle to not fall into hysterics when I read what everyone else has written and not compare. Even when I do well, it’s hard not to doubt. It’s hard not to feel like I’m getting it wrong so it can negate my excitement if I’m not careful.

I also worry people well question the integrity of my work because of who at least two of the judges are. I want to be above reproach in all things and I want to win on my own merit. Things have to be fair and I’m militant about that fact. They don’t know. The previous round when I wanted to disqualify myself because I was stressing about my entry, they refused to let me tell them so I could disqualify myself. I do not want anyone to believe I did well for any reason other than I put in a piece people liked.

Anyway, I was stressing through this voting round, making reading through the entries really difficult for me. I mentioned to TheDaddy™️ that I was struggling and getting a complex and didn’t want to read. He first told me to stop it, and then to refocus on the point of the marathon. This was about improving my writing, challenging myself to be a better writer, and rising to the challenge of being a creative. Focusing on that instead of how well I am/am not doing was what he wanted me to do so he made a suggestion. Haha, okay really he gave me a task.

Read through the entries and find 5 things that were done well. How can I use that and/or what does that inspire in me?

Doing this calmed me down as I read because I wasn’t thinking of who wrote better than me, but what was a great line or a great idea or a point I could use to make my own writing better. He’s a very clever man.

Note: not everything listed here is necessarily positive as it is things I’ve taken away from some of the stories I’ve read.

1. This line “The right to leave the table a lingering childhood privilege even as they acknowledge the onset of adulthood by letting her table”

It’s Charlie Powell’s entry 5, Little Silver Bullet. I… love that line. It just manages to communicates so much about the family, how the character views herself. How she’s literally in that strange place between childhood and adulthood. That one sentence is just caught my eye and said so much.

2. Tackling hard topics like loss, anger, or being without a partner even for a short time. Being braver in writing those things.

3. Annie Savoy’s story had the best executed ending. No wonder she scored so high. Writing a great ending can make or break a story, and that’s something I want to keep in mind as I continue on in writing.

4. Word choices matter when you’re going for a certain feeling. If you’re going for funny, a funny word is warranted. Tossing any word in your piece to make word count isn’t going to get the job done. Those things matter, word choice matters. That is important in the extra adjectives and adverbs you use also. Is it necessary to move the story along? If not, I should cut it.

5. Do more voyeur stories. I mean, the stories where there was watching involved or that someone walked in on someone wanking? That’s a yes for me. 😛

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That’s where I ended up. Just changing my mindset made the voting round easier. I stopped obsessing and looked at what I can get out of what others contributed.

I hope other people take that advice. Why are you in this competition? Why did you join? If it’s for more feedback on your writing, ask a judge or peer. If it’s to challenge your current writing abilities? Hang in. Hopefully you get out what you put in.

On to the next round.