Everybody Poops

Or conversations about anal sex

I’d been thinking about what I wanted to write for this since the topic popped up for this kink of the fortnight.

The obvious choice is my first experience with it

I finally met a guy on Fet that I’d been talking to for a while. Got the bright idea that I wanted to play out a non-con fantasy where he enters my hotel room and takes advantage of me. I work overnights and had very little sleep so I was alternating between being exhausted and amped up about when he’d show. We’d talked about a few things like anal for him (I purchased a very pretty strap on for that moment). The man was more of a s type and while I’ll top/switch a tiny bit, we all know I’m an s type through and through.

He did show, but it was a less than satisfying in the non-con aspect. We attempted to use the strap on, but he was in no way prepared to do it and I wasn’t going to push. Somehow it turned to anal sex with me on the receiving end. Frankly the experience was more uncomfortable bordering on painful with only slight elements of pleasure. It was enough pleasure that I’d be willing to try it again in the future, but not enough to make me overeager for it.

It was a bit of a mess, but not one he commented on though I was a little embarrassed about it. The night culminated with him coming on my face (I was in full makeup btw, something I rarely do). He buggered off home because he had full custody of his kid, and I went to bed. I was a bit meh about the experience overall. Both the anal and the mess. I’m no fan of facials to this day, mind you. While I talked to him many times after that, we never got together again.

My second experience? Better on the anal front. It was with a guy who I wasn’t totally sure was honest about his relationship status. He claimed his girlfriend, whom he had a baby with, was all good with him stepping out, but the way I found out about his unavailability struck me weird. The man gave me my first orgasm via oral sex AND penetrative sex. I literally screamed so loud when he was fucking me that I was so embarrassed to face my neighbors the next day. He was proud of himself on that front.

So with his capabilities assessed, when he asked if I’d like to try anal again, I was curiously reluctant. He convinced me he could do it no lube. Not smart, but again he’d demonstrated his remarkable abilities so I agreed. The man made me come via anal without touching my clit once. I was in love with him, but see above relationship status shadiness.

But then this time was a bigger mess. I mean, he went through a bunch of tissues during the act. In the moment, I felt too good to care. Frankly, he surprised the hell out of me that he made me come so I wasn’t too concerned about the mess… until after. Then, in typical female fashion, I was overwhelmed with embarrassment. Mostly when he went to the restroom to clean up/get things to clean me up. It began discussions of what I needed to do to prep for anal because that was amazing and I needed it in my life. *cue enemas before every meeting*

That relationship eventually ended because his life got too complicated, which really means he stood me up a bunch and I decided good sex wasn’t worth the trouble.

My goodness, this could deteriorate into a conversation about exes if I’m not careful. Maybe I should’ve used this as both my Kink of the Week and Wicked Wednesday entry. Guys have a history of standing me up, eh?

Anyway, I was discussing with Daddy and Molly the overarching theme that comes up in anal, the mess.

Dun dun DAH

I was admittedly horrified about the mess. I shouldn’t have been though. It’s a designated out hole that we’re stuffing something in to. Out of the out hole comes poop. Poop is messy. Everybody poops.

We could maybe blame porn for this attitude that anal is this clean process. When have you watched it and seen much in the way of a brown smear on a cock? I know I took to enemas and watching what I ate before the act to negate any… mess.

It’s always been interesting to me how delicate we are about poop though. It’s a bodily function everyone deals with and yet we treat it with disgust. I mean, it is gross, but it’s not something we should hide away. I notice I’ll act like I’m doing secret work in the bathroom when I have to poop. And how many a man has made some ridiculous comment about women and farting/pooping. As though our bodily functions don’t occur some how.

The funny thing is in every situation involving anal and poop, the gent has shrugged his shoulders as though it’s no big deal. Poop doesn’t get in the way of the pleasure, it’s easy to clean up, can be decreased in its occurrence. So back to my previous assertion, everyone poops. We shouldn’t let poop stop pleasure because shit happens.

I’m looking forward to a little more booty action. Perhaps if I ask nicely, DomSigns will oblige?