Craigslist Attempt 2

Kayla suggested I put yesterday’s blog post up on Craigslist just to see what I’d get. Out of sheer curiosity (of course), I did.

One thing I put is a height requirement because I am tall and this is one of the responses I got:

Are you 5’9″ or something. Fuck you bitches with your dumb ass height requirements, such bullshit. You’d cry yourself to sleep for weeks after I was done shoving my cock in your nasty ass cunt. 5’10” my big azz balls.

Stupid bitch.

I laughed and deleted, but I should’ve replied as follows:

Dear Shorty,

I’m sorry my height requirements offended you and you felt it necessary to tell me about it. As a tall woman, I felt it was okay to want a taller man. Nothing like being significantly taller than your guy to make a girl feel good.

Seeing as your reply was filled with vitriol, I doubt highly that a) you’d even know how to use your supposed equipment, b) the only crying I would do is from regret. But since you’ve proven what a douche you are I don’t have to worry about that, do I?

I do appreciate you taking the time to reply to me though. If nothing else, it says you’re passionate if not a bit misguided. Good luck finding love!

Yours,

Cara

Meeting someone for dinner later. I confess to having very low expectations considering, but he seems nice. I’ll report back with more.

Ps: my post was just flagged as inappropriate and taken down. Is it bad that I’m glad? Some of these guys are different…

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  1. Nick

    If you met him you would surely have cried yourself to sleep, in mourning for the evil done to the English language by such idiots. People like him give Craigslist a bad name!

    PS You cannot address them as ‘Shorty’. I believe ‘Vertically Challenged’ is ok, though. Probably because most of them will have no idea what you are on about.

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  2. Pingback: Fiction Relay – Part 44 | The Reclining Gentleman

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      Cara Thereon

      There really isn’t much to lose. You don’t have to go out with anyone who contacts you. It tends to be more funny than anything else, but it’s not something I’d make a regular thing out of.

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      1. G

        A woman who seems to know what she wants must be exciting for them. Sounds like you don’t have to check that email account now though. Sexy Mr. Accent…hope we get more of a description tomorrow 😉

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