Write

I realized the rate of quality stories coming from me has dropped lately. There are probably a host of reasons including the fact that I’m acting out more of my fantasies so there isn’t as much to write about. Then again, I’m wondering if it stems from a lack of true inspiration on my part.

My muse has gone on vacation leaving me here without a shred of writing ability. That bitch (he’s a guy, but I’m beginning to think he’s a gay man. Temperamental, wears taffeta and loves his men hung)!

The few stories I’m able to write are my usual fantasies constructed while I ride public transit. Living in the city is definitely fodder for indulging my kinky imagination at work. It’s easy though, the taking of a nameless individual and constructing some hot story around them. That’s simple images to masturbate to that I write down.

I’m just feeling inadequate lately. Intimidated by certain people navigating in my world.

Take this new guy I’m finding myself drawn to. The image of the man I’m looking for in many ways. Articulate, intelligent, compassionate, caring, passionate, humorous, sensitive, naughty, conversationalist, poetic, and adorable. But the touch of emotional unavailability is disconcerting. Or maybe I’m just projecting…

I’m not intimidated by him, but by the image of the woman that he wants. In many ways I don’t feel I am nor can I be that woman. The ease of our interactions (no, we haven’t had sex of any kind) makes me more nervous instead of less. Almost as though my ability to talk to him and develop some kind of emotional attachment over such a short period of time scares the hell out of me. I’ve not had a guy who wasn’t my friend call me to just talk since high school. It’s a surprise every time he does it too!

But this is a post about my writing.

I’m stymied. Honestly, just stuck. Either I need some steady excitement to fuel my fantasies or I need to start doing writing prompts again. The lack of dedication to my craft is unacceptable.

Having next week lends itself to figuring it out. I am open to writing suggestions if anyone has them.

Comments

  1. rushmorejudd

    Sometimes I think erotic writing is born out of a combination of high libido and some level of frustration. I guess if all of our libido needs were constantly met, it would be hard to fantasize.
    I suspect this guy, if he calls to just talk has some interest beyond the platonic. For inspiration consider how bold you could be with him knowing he wants you. What would he do if you exposed your breast, showed him your tattoos or piercing, asked him about potential piercings. Imagine a way to undress yourself in front of him. Or touching. Sore back? Desperate for someone to rub the kink out of your lower back. Perhaps he could fulfill your desire to have some artistic nudes taken. Does he like to take photos? Does he have any equipment. Just saying. (I sometimes found in my real relationships that I became a bit too bold and scared people off because of my imagination, so don’t necessarily act on your fantasies. I repeat that tis guy has some interest, however.)

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      Cara Thereon

      See, our conversations aren’t platonic at all. Some of the things he says to me make me squirm! I just can’t pin him down for a date though. I’ve met him, but want to spend more time together. He seduces me with his words.

      I’ll try your suggestions. He’s does do photography and maybe writing about the possibility of that encounter would get me going. Thanks!

  2. Nick

    “Take this new guy I’m finding myself drawn to…”
    We men that are “Articulate, intelligent, compassionate, caring, passionate, humorous, sensitive, naughty, conversationalist, poetic, and adorable” do this all the time. We are putting up entry barriers that protect our sensitive souls from women. You just have to push us a bit harder, to make sure we know that you are not there to ream us. If you don’t push a little, you are guaranteed not to get. After which, make sure you clear your calender! And don’t worry about that ‘other woman’. Let her worry about you. If she is actually anything other than an imaginary foil to your ambitions:-)
    (P.S. Ok. Maybe I lied about the ‘we’ bit.)

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      Cara Thereon

      I’ve pushed a little, but he doesn’t seem to have a ton of time. It leaves me questioning the likelihood of our getting together.

      And “that woman” is the very real combo of his exes. I can’t compete in many ways.

      1. Nick

        It is very difficult to displace a fantasy woman made up of several ‘perfect’ (but failed relationships somehow) women. He needs to move on from these and get to grips with a hot willing woman. Like you, if he is lucky.

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          Cara Thereon

          Well, I guess we’ll see if he can make the time. I’m going to have to move on if he can’t as much as I don’t want to. I’m giving him the benefit because we haven’t been talking long.

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  3. creativityorcrazy

    Hang in there and hopefully your writing muse will inspire you some more. I’m thinking maybe I need to hit the prompts too. I can write, but I’m getting tired of everything I write being too disheartening and too real. I need a break from heavy writing and life. Need the beach, but looks as if I won’t get to dip my toes in the sand this year.

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  4. II

    There are crickets on my blog as you can see. I hate that I’m all work and less play. No motivation or consistent fountain of inspiration to draw from to write. I like that you do share what you do, even if it’s a made up story.

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